sad sad sad

sad lar..
>.<

so sad..



zz

today sad..jEaLouS

today damn sad..
during maths exam..
coz can't help kit in maths..
heard someone called "jun jie"
sorry kit..
in a sudden..
my maths not that good..
a feel of jealous mix with anger..
so sad T.T
rushed to the heart & brain..
me bad..
lose control..unconsciously
whole day also not feeling comfortable..
bad...
haiz..

what should or "could" a say??

ugh..
sorry ar..
janji kosong me..
said wanted to help but didn't..
coz..
don't want people think too much..
sorry..
damn myself..
another word..
regreted..-.-

saw you later..
then suddenly got this ominous thought in my mind..
geez..
you are no trivial for me..
in agony when i gave this stupid reaction..
sorry..

mixed up.. pretend = bad + regret + pain

mixed feelings today..
because of you..
stupid you..
crazy you..
damm you..
you moron..
shit you..
-.-'''

ugh
should i blame you??
or should i blame he??
she??
or they??
or the injection given by the nurse yesterday??

ugh
i'm the one who's in problem actually..
shouldn't blaming at others.
coz i pretended today..
pretended didn't see what i had saw..
didn't feel what i'm feeling..
quite hard to pretend..
*quite admire those who pretend well*

what i get??
a piece of shit..
shit shit shit..
regreted..
i tell myself..
never pretend again..

But i'm lack of bravery..
it stuck in the deep heart of mine..
arg.. thinking too much again..
and again..
repeating the same process everyday..
so sick

放手，放开所有...
tried..
but everytime i merely succeed..
i fail again..
everytime..
should i let go?
or what??
can't decide now..
let time decide for me..

i would like to..
express my "appreciation"..
for you to give me such mixed-up-feelings..
thanks..-.-

p.s.-- words within words..lolx..
p.s2-- erm..purple..why u cried de??

no..no..

i've been deprived..
of patience..

don't let me waited in vain...
for you to notice my presence..
can't you just be more sensitive??
can't you?

i've been waiting..
but you still omitted to answer..
under this circumstances..
nothing would have pleasant me..


i applauded for my own confidence..
the realization had crushed me into pieces..
i'm been a doom mood that time..

i've try to ameliorate the situation..
and the results are unexpected..

it has just turn into my favour..

it's not the beginning of the end..
it's not over yet..
it has just started..
from zero to full-tilt..
it is meant to happen..

me..me..me..

wow..this is the most accurate xin li ce yan i've ever taken before..

"Loves to chat. Loves those who loves them. Loves to takes things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care of what others think. Emotional. Decisive. Strong clairvoyance. Loves to travel, the arts and literature. Touchy and easily jealous. Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Easily influenced. Easily loses confidence. Loves children."

yup..found myself emotional thess days.."boys should be tough" they said..then why am i so emotional..should i just pretend to be tough?? i can't do it...

lolx..

feeling weird today..
feeling like that time at Petaling Street like that..
gone..

yeah won father in chess game yesterday..
play with him 20 times only won him twice..
getting pro me..
xP

father's scolding me s'ing' too much..
he said: u better control yourself..
nehneh..
s only mah..
nth's bad..
cause friendship not forever de...
next year everyone will be in different class..
appreciate what u have now..